12/2/2021

Another fucking cloudy day at the beach!!! In this moment I shall take a deep breath and cherish my moment fully. Inhaling gratitude deep into my dantain*

*Dantian, or dan tian, translates from Chinese to mean “field of elixir.” It describes what’s believed by some to be the seat of life force energy in the body. The concept of dantian has roots in Taoist and Buddhist traditions and is believed to be related to higher states of consciousness.

I have been practicing mindfulness meditation far a touch over 3 years and I highly recommend it. It has helped me keep a peaceful center with what little of my mind has not been shook by the earthquake of life. My least favorite thing about the practice is how difficult it is to describe. As I aspire into what will hopefully become an illustrious and fulfilling writing career, effective descriptions will be important inventory. Something about the ability to recognize our state of mind in any moment and release the chains of impulse and emotion at will, is nothing short of a superpower. All the worst moments inside my mind have been when a thought, feeling, or emotion had me at gunpoint. Extreme grief and fear are particularly abusive once claws are sunk. Setting an alarm in the mind to wail when the feelings meter exceeds a certain threshold recovers our power over the following moments. Maybe we go for the ride, and maybe we do not, but it is our choice to make. I don’t always choose to unhitch. I still call the occasional bad driver a flavorful name. I delay admitting to myself “it’s just a TV show” and cry it out a little longer when an America’s Got Talent judge hits the golden buzzer. However I do not let thoughts cascade once the moment has been endured.

I say all this not only as a testimony to the power, and a full endorsement for practicing mindfulness meditation; but also a reminder to myself that cloudy days get me a little down, i get to choose what to do with that. Today I am sharing a song of the day with beautiful humans reading my shared observations. To everyone reading this; you’re doing great, there is a lot more love and beauty in the world than it may see through the lenses available, and this person here cares about you a great deal.

Song of the day:

The evening is that weird kind of fog that can’t make its mind up. It chills my hands while I sweat under my hoodie. It is the type of pretty that makes me tolerate this indecipherable intent.

Fog so thick it traps the light in droplets.

This life shit is not easy. Let’s give each other a break. Compassion is poison to an egos disfunction. Always strive to be the first to get to that place in any encounter.

This line is from a beautiful poem by W.H. Auden.

If equal affection cannot be, let the more loving one be me.

I like that.

One thought on “12/2/2021

  1. sfedis December 3, 2021 / 2:03 pm

    The line from the poem is itself an affirmation…beautiful!

Leave a Reply